As a writer I constantly have a lot on my mind.
Things I want to write about.
Things I probably should write about.
Things I need to write about to submit to get more blogs published.
But here lately I really haven’t been writing a lot.
To be honest I’ve really just been focusing on my self.
I spend a lot of time alone, in the car on the way to work or anywhere, at home, alone.... so it's inevitable that I just think
If I have done any writing it’s in my book and gosh I want so badly to get that book finished and published.
My goal was this year but due to finances and moving and focusing on me, I’ve put it off.
But it stays on my mind constantly.
I call my sister daily and we laugh about how the book is and SHOULD play out.
I can’t really go into detail but if you heard us, you’d laugh.
Moving to San Antonio I was scared.
My first week here I thought real hard about my job and if it’s something I really even want to do.
I thought about just going home and moving back into my house and “settling” somewhere I don’t want to be.
I thought I don’t really belong here seeing as I know literally 2 people in this town.
But then I thought to myself, “no you need this, Lisset.”
I thought to myself that home didn’t really feel like home anymore and that at the end of the day home is what you make it.
Now I’m living in an apartment with roommates and I don’t have even a 1/4 of my things not to mention my CLOTHES, I don’t have even 1/16th of my clothes. I’m sad I don’t have my girly decor, I’m sad I don’t have freaking Christmas decorations, but at the end of the day I have a nice place for now, I go to work all day, come home and work more and then sleep.
I have a different mindset being self employed now. The word HUSTLE is embedded in me. I think it always has been but it really is more than ever now.
And all while I’m learning a new city, learning a new line of work, and still trying to sell my house back “home”..... through it all I still choose happiness.
When things around keep trying to show the negative.... I still decide happiness.
It's not always easy... but it's the better way.
Through this entire process I’ve been learning so much about myself.
I think we are always a work in progress and we should always take the time to focus on ourselves and learn new things, I have the opportunity to really learn and focus and decide what I truly want and don’t want.
And one thing I don’t want is unhappiness.
So while I’m in a new city, alone, at a new job, which some weeks can be very frustrating, in a brand new home that isn’t mine and dealing with the hell of a nightmare “for sale by owner” has been for me, I STILL choose happiness.
Because why let the negativity of things bring you down.
Why let you things you have no control over take your happiness.
And it’s crazy because 6 months ago I would've been throwing a fit. Hell even 2 months ago I would've let the negative overcome me. But nope. I have a support system that I call, vent about it and then let it go. If there's nothing I can do about it then why be mad about it. And if there is something I can do about it then I will still choose to be happy. Because at the end of the day there's so many more things to be unhappy about and why let the little things bring you down.
This move has had so much change in my life, and while the last couple of weeks have been nothing short of amazing and me finding out so much about myself I’m seeing so many beautiful things.
This past weekend I got to watch my very best friend shoot a buck. Not her first but a nice trophy for sure and all while getting to shoot the shit, drink some cold ones and get some more meat to add to the freezer.
To say it’s an adrenaline rush is an understatement.
I’ve never shot a deer because the one buck I had in my cross hairs I let it go, but the adrenaline to be in the stand with my best friend and to watch her take it down was unexplainable.
I’d replay that afternoon any day of the week.
Then I went hiking, fishing on the Guadalupe River in Guadalupe State Park. Talk about some breathtaking views.
I think this view on life has always been embedded in me, I just had to peel back some layers to truly get the full outlook on it.
A good friend told me this recently and this is enough to keep me going... “I see a big and bright future for you ahead. You have what it takes. You have the desire in your heart. And most of all, you have God covering all the bases for you. He wants what’s truly best for you. I promise. But you have to be patient. And not settle. Enjoy this time and learn the lessons He wants you to see and grow from.”
Until next time.....
