Road Rage

Is road rage a disorder?

Well, this disorder of mine is pretty much out of control. I tend to normally keep it pretty rational until some complete mo-ron(in my best Reba voice) completely pisses me off.


Yesterday  I was heading to a softball game(where I did not strike out swinging), but I did see someone else do that( I completely felt his pain). I wasn't running late but I was on normal time of arrival given that I don't hit traffic or get behind some idiot driving slow. Like super slow. Like UNDER THE SPEED LIMIT THEREFORE IT'S SLOW!

Anyway, so I am driving behind him, going pretty slow, until I realize... WTF, WHY ARE WE GOING SO SLOW? So I go to the left to go around him and this dude decides to speed up and when I look over and realize he isn't slowing down I look over and he is waving his middle finger at me while starring at the road ahead of him. WHAT, THE, EFFFFFF?

A few things start immediately going through my head.
1.) Is he wearing headphones? (While flicking me off?) DUDE! You can't flick me off, while wearing headphones( I assume you're listening to your phone radio, because yours probably doesn't work.) I know it doesn't work because he is driving a beat up Honda which I probably wouldn't have even noticed had he not flicked me off.

2.) Is he flicking me off but can't even look my way? I mean seriously? If you want to flick me off then you better make that eye contact to make it real. Make is a firm flick off like one of those real firm hand shakes! You know!

3.) It's a real good thing I don't drive a huge truck with a grill guard on it because that recent flick off deserves a little nudge, or a simple ram into the side of his vehicle. EITHER ONE!

So then I stay right behind him, giving him the stink eye(he probably didn't even see me), and YES, I flicked him back off(because two wrongs make a right, RIGHT?) Not to mention, I begin yelling at him(as if he could hear me) and thinking to myself "I am Mexican, you messed with the wrong vato."

But I'm not really a vato. I was just bluffing. He doesn't have to know that.

Then, ironically I see that video all over Facebook of that road rage karma... (in case you haven't seen it, here it is Road Rage Karma). Anyway, after seeing that I think to myself, WHY COULDN'T THIS HAVE HAPPENED TO THAT MAN WHO JUST FLICKED ME OFF? But then I stop and think, "nahhh I really don't want that to happen to him..." I'd really just like to have a chat with the guy, let him know that he needs to be more firm with the way he flicks people off, and that I'm a crazy Mexican and that he probably shouldn't EVER do that again.(Just need to light a little fire in his YOU KNOW WHAT.)

Until my next time behind the wheel.