Are You His Bootycall Or A Good Morning Text?

Okay y'all. 

This is about to get so real. 

I'm sitting talking with a girlfriend of mine and she's talking about her new dating life. 

After 3 years of dating she's back in the game. 

She's learning really quickly how much it sucks. 

So we got to talking about dating and if it even exsits anymore?

Are you dating just to date or is it even going somewhere?

I think you get to a certain age where you realize if you're dating someone it's because you see a potential future with this person. 

That doesn't mean you're going to get married tomorrow but it just means hey I see a future here so I'm not talking to you and everyone else. 

It means don't say you have feelings for me, sleep with me then "not do relationships" and drop out. 

So I'm 28, and my dating life is pretty much non existent. 

This is what happens...

I meet someone, I like them, we go on a date, we talk morning noon and night, we have lots of fun together and then bam, you say I'm not right for you. 

Hmmmm. Okay. 

Or let's say someone is interested in me, they message me on some form of social media(because that's what we do nowadays) they ask to hang out, I do, and then they awkwardly hit on me the entire time insinuating they want sex. 

Okay let's be real clear here.... I'm not a piece of meat. 

I'm not just here for sex. 

I'm here because I want to see where this will go and straight to the bedroom isn't it. 

I have morals. 

I don't just show my body parts to anyone. 

So, if you're wanting to hang out....

Which side of the road are you on?

Are you incoming traffic or are you leaving? 

Because I need to know now. 

I get it, no one wants to be honest because that means being vulnerable and god forbid we actually have feelings but seriously, cut the shit. 

So here is the deal....and this goes out to both LADIES AND GENTLEMAN in the situation.... if you're not texting "Good Morning" or trying to go on a dinner date or to see a movie... stop wasting our time. 

I'm not the one you message late at night. 

I'm not the one you message after the bar when you're drunk.  

I'm the girl you want to cook breakfast for. 

I'm the girl you take around your family. 

I'm the girl you're proud to show off. 

And until you're ready for that... let's not waste our time here. 

Until next time...

Credits go to Kelsey Weingand for this post. 

Always Kiss Me Goodnight

And always tell me Good Morning. 

And always tell me you love me. 

If you're just a friend or even family. 

Don't forget to say it. 

Yesterday I went to a funeral for my mom's cousin and after I went to the hospital to visit a family friend who has cancer.

It was just another reminder how short life is. 

People leave us too soon.  

Death happens. 

But do we tell them we love them?

That's one thing I've thought about a lot since my mom died is did I tell her I loved her enough. 

Did I say it enough that last day with her?

Have you told the ones you love, that you love them?

Maybe your parents, a friend, or someone you have feelings for.

Take the chance. 

Voice your love. 

Because life is too short to go to bed angry, to forget to tell someone you love them, for a missed opportunity. 

So always kiss them goodnight... and always tell them you love them. 

You don't want to wake up one day regretting that you didn't. 

Until next time. 

Quay vs. Rayban Sunnies

Alright y'all. 

I can't forget why I originally started this blog which was to blog about clothes, accessories and anything else. 

Well, I bought my first pair of Quay sunnies and I love them. 

I love my Raybans too but I LOVE the lens color on these. 

The difference is my Raybans are polarized and I'm pretty sure these Quay aren't. 

The Quay were $48 and some change at my all time favorite boutique Giddy Up Glamour whereas my Raybans cost me $200 from Sunglasses Hut but do come with a nice replacement if need be. 

I love my Oakley Hollbrooks for when I'm playing softball because they don't fall off my face. 

I love my Raybans for when I'm fishing or at a concert festival. 

And I love these Quay because they're cute and I hope I don't lose them in the river this summer. Lol. 

Anyway, they're worth it to me if you don't mind spending a little money on them. They look like aviators and have a cute lens color too. 

All in all. I give them a 9. 

And that's just because only I'm a 10. 😂😂😂

Until next time. 

Don't Be Afraid Of A Strong Woman

"Here's to strong women, May we know them, May we be them, May we raise them."

What's it like being a strong woman?

Intimidating.

And what's worse is when you're 28 and have seen more trials than most 50 year olds and you still wear your crown straight, it's even more intimidating.

But why?

Doesn't everyone want a strong and independent woman?

My boss and I have this thing we always say... "I know what I bring to the table. So believe me when I say I'm not afraid to eat alone."

That statement comes off way more harsh than it sounds.

It just means I like to bring the bread to the table too. But it also means that if you don't like my bread then I'll eat it alone.

Strong women are rare.

Everyone wants to talk about being one but they're not.

And strong women aren't always strong.

We may have not started out that way.

Something could've happened that we had no choice to be strong and it just stuck.

And there's nothing wrong with not being a strong woman it's just being one has its challenges if you are one.

You run off friends.

You run off significant others.

It's a constant battle.

YOU SCARE THE SHIT OUTTA PEOPLE!!!!!!

I can constantly hear my mom in my head when I talk about being too strong for a man. I can here her saying "Lisset, if he's not strong enough then he's not the one."

And my Momma was always pretty much right.

But, sometimes someone is going through something that maybe they're not as strong as they normally are.

That's called timing. It's just off.

And that's okay.

We all have those times.

What I do know is that those strong, independent, have their shit together women.... they're the ones you don't need to let go of.

Here's the truth about strong women.

We don't NEED you.

We WANT YOU.

And to me that's the best kind.

It means instead of settling with that need, we made that choice.

A choice in you.

Now, don't think she's always going to be strong. Because she won't. There will be times of weakness. And that's when she is going to need you the most.

Maybe it's a bad day, or she had a bad dream. Maybe something reminded her of the awful thing in the past that made her this strong....

She will need you then. The one she chose.

So pick her up her on the bad, and ride with her during the good.

She might stay up all night under the stars talking about her dreams and goals, but also talk about her fears and nightmares.

SHE WANTS YOU THERE FOR BOTH.

Being with a strong woman is scary.

And I can't understand why.

If we are strong it means we're going to be strong for you too.

It means your bad dreams and your nightmares that we will be there to hold you.

It means that when you want to stay up all night and talking under the stars about what's on your mind... we will be there too.

Don't be afraid of her...The strong woman.

Man up.

Stand up.

Take her for what she is.

She will piss you off.

She will argue with you.

She will act like she doesn't need you. 

But she does. 

But she will be the hardest worker you've ever met.

She will take care of the kids on your long days of work.

She will clean the house and cook dinner as long as you promise to cook on the weekends too.

Because even though she is strong, she will still be soft.

She will let her guard down with you.

Not completely but it'll come down.

She will laugh and cry and be serious and do all of the things you want to do as long as you do them with her.

So don't be scared of her. 

"She is independent but that doesn't mean she doesn't want someone she can depend on." Pierre Jeanty

Are You In A Flirtationship?

We've all got that one person that we just can't get over.

Or maybe that we constantly run back to.

Maybe they are someone we've had in our life for a while.

Or maybe they are someone we just met a few months ago.

Regardless, you're both not in a relationship.

But you both flirt with each other and give just enough attention to keep coming around.

A FLIRTATIONSHIP.

Google says.....

"A flirtationship is a relationship between two friends, where both people engage in flirtatious behavior without the promise of becoming anything more. This is very different from the Friend Zone and the Friends with Benefits. A flirtationship is situated somewhere in between those two."

That's a real life definition. Lol.

The Chemistry is there.

You two enjoy each other's company.

You do that drunk text thing from time to time.

Or you both get drunk and tell each other how much you like each other but then don't talk the next day.

Weird huh.

That's how flirtationships are.

I had a conversation with my friend yesterday and I told her "WHY DO I LIKE HIM SO MUCH?"

And seriously, I mean it. I barely know him. I've hung out with him a handful of times but WHY CAN'T I GET HIM OUT OF MY HEAD??

You know what she told me, "It's because you're having to chase him. Because you want more. If there wasn't the chase you would probably be over it."

There's some truth to that.

Yeah I am not going to lie, the chase is fun. I'll chase you if I know what that's what you want.

But, I'm not chasing you if you're chasing someone else.

So here's what you do...

You throw in the towel.

You let go.

Be done.

Flirtationships lead to heartache.

Almost always someone get's attached.

Let him or her go.

You're too good to be in a flirtationship.

Maybe you're scared.

Maybe they are scared.

But enough is enough.  

You deserve to be with the one who only wants you.

You deserve to be with the one who despite being scared wants to take that chance. 

If they are in a flirtationship with you, just imagine how many others they are in one with.

Easier said that done, right?

Nope. 

Let go.

BE DONE.

Delete that phone number. 

Move. The. Heck. On. 

I know I am. 

Watch!!!

Find Your Person & Find Your People

I'll never forget the episode on Greys where Meridith tells Christina "You are my person, you will always be my person.


Everyone in life needs a person.


Whether it be family or a friend.


You need them.


I always say that if I needed to hide a dead body I would call my sister. 


To me that is the true value of a friendship. The one you can tell your deepest darkest secrets to. 


But since she's my sister she's not my person because she's my sister and that trumps everyone to me.


But I do have a person.


Her name is Allison.


Allison Ray Alford.


My beautiful, red headed PERSON.


Your person is just the one who gets you. The one who would be there at 3am for a phone call, a shoulder to lean on, the person to help bail you out of jail if they aren't already sitting next to you. They're just that person you can sit in silence with and not expect anything from one another.


I met Allison at a cattle company we both used to work at. We were both very stand offish at first. Kind of like, ''okay I wanna get to know you but idk about it.''


We are weird...I know.


We have the exact same personality.


We both laugh loud, talk loud, and say what's on our minds(not sure who is worse, it's a close competition).


So, initially meeting we weren't bffs or anything but after like two weeks I remember her coming into my office and asking if I needed anything when she went to run errands. I told her no and we got to talking about people we both knew.


She had just become single and I asked her if she wanted to go out one night.


That would be the beginning to an awesome friendship.

Oh, we went out alright.


Again and again.


We had long talks, drank beers, cried together, road trips together, and even danced in the car together.


This girl watched me bury my mother and never judged me when it came to crazy family situations.


She made friends with my friends as well as introducing me to hers.


She's always been real and honest with me.


So yeah, somewhere along the way she became my person.


She's busy being a full time student (almost done with the Rad Tech program) while attending TAMU. She has a boyfriend and spends a lot of time with her family.


Needless to say she's super busy and so am I.


But we always pick up where we leave off.


A random text here or there.


She's always there if I need her.


But since I don't always have her around, I told myself I needed to make some new friends.


Friendship isn't about who you've known the longest, it's about who walked into your life said "I'm here for you and proved it."


I recently realized how amazing people are.


God puts people in your life for a reason.


About two months ago I got bored and wanted to do something I hadn't done in a while so I contacted a girl (Kayli Morsko) I hadn't ever really hung out with but knew through softball. She said they were going out and said I could join.


And God am I thankful I did.


I've met so many new faces since.


Kayli, Shelby, Savannah and Kelsey are now all my people too.


After my husband and I split I lost a lot of friends. People that I now realize were only friends because it was convenient. Maybe our husbands or boyfriends played softball together, or maybe they were old high school buddies but nevertheless not my friends.


It was then that I realized I only had my person.


I needed more than a person. I need people.


THESE PEOPLE GET ME.


It's funny because I used to be really shy about some things that have happened in my life. I wouldn't tell anyone because I was afraid people would judge me. I mean people did judge me so I put my guard up about it. Then, one day I realized I didn't give a shit anymore if people knew. I didn't care what they thought. Because at the end of the day yes it happened but it doesn't define who I am. Yes, it had a hand in changing me but it didn't make me. 

I made me.


SO, I told myself that anyone that I date or become friends with will know these things.


I'll tell you right off the bat and if you run, then you weren't meant to be in my life anyway.


These girls didn't do that.


They asked. They listened. They took me in for who I am.


Allison did that too. 


My new friends did that.


THESE ARE MY PEOPLE.


Everyone needs people.

Again, God puts people in your life for a reason. 

When I'm with any of these people, it's constant laughs, truths and fun. 

Yes we can be serious. 

But life is already serious enough, so why not have fun with your friends. 

If you're struggling with friends or relationships, do something different and make some new friends. 

Because everyone needs their people. 

And I thank God for mine!

The Truth Is...

It's a damn good feeling when people you haven't heard from in years, message you and tell you how great you look, how happy you are now, how proud of you they are, etc.  

I've had multiple friends I haven't seen or spoken to in a while tell me that recently. 

I'm just here to say that it has taken me a very long time to get here.

Since I have been back to writing my book and each night I write a little or jot down some ideas for the book. I am telling you, this thing is going to be great, but in the meantime I've been thinking a lot about my life and where all I have been, what I've been through, and sometimes I feel that so much negative has happened in my life in the last 3 years that I often forget to remember some really great things about my life. 

Things that have happened when I was a kid or maybe as a teenager that are just too great to be put on the back burner and not remembered as frequently as other things remembered. 

Today a bad storm came through and I can't help but remember the times as a little girl when it would storm and the lights would go out my sister and I would always go climb in bed with our mom. We would sit there and laugh and giggle for hours until we fell back asleep. My mom would always laugh at how cold my feet were(and still are to this day) when I would put them on her needing some of her warm comfort. 

Something that used to be so scary now a beautiful memory.

CRAZY HOW THAT HAPPENS. 

For those of you who follow me on social media, it's no secret that I miss my mom. 

Although I am happy for her and how she is no longer suffering, I often times need to hear her voice, or need to hold her hand. That's just something every child needs and definitely every 28 year old girl needs from their mom. 

Right???

RIGHT! 

Well, let me tell you that after losing my mom I was in a very dark place. 

I was planning a wedding, trying to buy a house, trying to buy a new vehicle, all while coping with the loss of my mothers and some life changing events that happened regarding my dad. 

I was engaged to my (soon to be ex) husband two months before my mom died. 

Her and I didn't even get to enjoy it together.

Looking back, I would change sooooo much about it all but what you can you do.

NO REGRETS!!

I planned the wedding mainly by myself because my sister wasn't here and my bridesmaids were off living their own lives so it was pretty much just me, crafting and what not. Now, don't get me wrong, people did help I just didn't want to bother too much because planning a wedding is a nightmare. 

I got married and lived happily ever after... right???

WRONG.

There were some things that happened before our wedding and actually the day of that really set the tone for what our marriage would be like. 

Needless to say, the very next day after our wedding wasn't the greatest between our families.

Blake and I lasted 10 whole months before I asked him to get out of the house.

The crazy thing is that it wasn't even that hard for me to say that. I mean how could it be... I had already buried my mom 9 months before that and watched my father be taken away from 1 month prior to that. 

There are things that happen in your life that you know you will never be the same again. 

A before and an after sort of thing. 

I loved Blake more than I've ever loved another human being.

I knew the wrinkles on his forehead, the calm of his breath, the loudness of his snore, the way he ate, the way he played softball, how he would catch the ball or take an at bat, the way he would brush his hair and even his teeth.... I knew this man like the back of my hand.

Fuck, how could I not? I had devoted the last 5 years of my life to him. I had quit friendships and pushed family away. I had put myself in this hole that included only me and Blake.

I thought he hung the moon.

But he didn't. 

I did.

I hung the moon.

I had to. 

I had to get myself up off the floor. 

I had to wipe my tears away.

I had to scream into a pillow on nights I couldn't bare to breathe another minute knowing she was never coming back.

I hung my moon.

Not Blake, not my sister, not my mom, not my dad, not anyone else but me.

And let me tell you, it was REALLY lonely on that moon by myself. 

But I told myself I needed to hang this moon for myself so that after nightfall, I could have the most beautiful sunshine there ever was.

It wasn't easy. 

Some days I didn't know how I was going to make it but I knew I would figure it out. 

AND I DID!

Although leaving Blake wasn't easy it was something I needed to do.

I love him and always will.

I took vows to love him forever and that I will always mean.

But sometimes you can love someone and not be IN love with them and sometimes you can love someone and you not be together.

That's where we are.

I know Blake loves me and would give me the moon if I asked him to.

But that's not what I want.

Hell, That's not what I need. 

I am still working on myself... I mean, aren't we all?

I've always had big dreams and goals for myself and I've done pretty well at accomplishing them.

This last year has led me to so many new places and faces.

I've made some amazing new friends, I've seen new sunsets and I've felt new love. 

One closed door is always an opportunity to open a new one.

My point is.... I got knocked down once, twice and three times and each time I got back up.

You have to. 

You can't let the negative things define you. You have to own them, make them your bitch and move on. 

So the truth is, when I get a compliment about how great I'm doing in life and how great I look, yeah.... I LOVE IT! 

Those eyelashes. Those shoes.

  

Ladies. 

Gentlemen. 

Do you see those shoes?

Do you see those eyelashes??

If you don't do anything else today go and get the shoes. 

Go and get your girl an appointment for those eyelashes.  

You need them. 

Your wife needs them.

Your momma even needs them. 

They're cute. 

They're cheap. 

But they're freaking comfy. (Both the shoes and eyelashes) 

And that's the most important part. 

And what's even better if they're reasonably priced. 

$37.99 for the shoes and right now it's BOGO half off! 

$79.99 for the eyelashes and I made a new friend today, tell Danielle I sent you at Amazing Lash Studio. 

I'm all about helping other people out and trust me when I say these won't let you down!!!

💋

What Dating Is Like In 2017.

That picture there...

That's me and my date.

Good ole Corralejo.

He doesn't ever let me down!

But dating.... now.... in this time...

Sucks.

It's a joke.

YUP.

I said it.

My friend shared this post that was written a year ago by a guy on Facebook and he said " Relationships have been replaced with "talking". Which consist of pointlessly texting and a random phone call here and there. People text or "talk" merely to fill a void when they get bored. Commitment is a rare thing to find. Date nights really don't exist much anymore. Chivalry is pretty much a thing of the past. There's no more opening the truck door for her or going to the front door to pick her up for a date. Today's society cheating has been accepted way more than it should be and people classify it as a mistake. Since it is accepted more people continue to go back to the same person that has cheated on them repeatedly. (Albert Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, btw.) Feelings don't really matter anymore and it's became a hurt someone before you get hurt kind of world. Cheating or crossing the line has became way too easy with social media. People don't put in the effort that it takes to keep a relationship healthy or work. When things get tough people give up. Relationships have lost its value over the years and they aren't how they are supposed to be anymore. To the girls that say there aren't any good guys left in the world, maybe you should reevaluate the kind of guys you pursue. To the guys that can't find a good girl, I can guarantee that you aren't looking in the right places. " 
PROPS TO YOU JORDAN CHRISTOPHER POWELL 

I'd have to say that I don't agree with the 'chivalry being a thing of the past' and that's just because I happen to know and be around a lot of good ole country folk who open doors and say yes ma'am and take their hats off when they introduce themselves to someone. 

I'm still stuck on the "People text or "talk" merely to fill a void when they get bored."


Or how about the "relationships have been replaced with 'talking.' Which consist of pointlessly texting andd a random phone call here and there." 

ON. MOTHER. LOVING. POINT.

After becoming a newly single woman and being open to meeting new people and getting to know others, I've learned that dating.....FREAKING SUCKS.

People only want to talk to you when it's convenient for them.

Or what's even better....

PEOPLE ONLY TALK TO YOU WHEN THEY'RE DRUNK!



I get told the most interesting things when someone is drunk...

1.) You're like a unicorn, people like you don't exist.(rolls eyes) 

2.) I like you but I'm scared... (rolls eyes)

3.) I don't do relationships.  (ROLLS EYES AGAIN)



And you know the old statement goes...."A Drunken Mind Speaks A Sober Heart" 



Sooo, what you're saying is you have the balls to say this when you're drunk but not sober.

BUT when you're sober you still want to call me but don't have the guts?

But you're sober so you're not going to make the move and just wait until you're drunk to call me again??



THIS IS GETTING ENTIRELY TOO CONFUSING!!!!

THEN...


I see a video on Facebook today about "How Millennials Will Talk About Love" and y'all... it's so disappointing what this has turned into.

Tender.
Bumble.
Farmers Only.
(Who gets on these sites... not this girl)

Sliding into the DMs....

It's just ridiculous.

Okay, not going to lie.... I did my first SLIDE INTO THAT DM about a month or so ago. 

LOL.

But I wasn't weird or creepy about like "Hey just wanted to say you're so beautiful" or "Hey I would love to meet you in person."

It was more like "Hey thanks for the help and it was nice meeting you." 

Sliding into someone's DM doesn't have to be creepy.

Say hi. Talk if you must. Exchange numbers. Get to know each other. Go fishing. Lay under the stars and talk for hours. 

DO THE DAMN THING.

BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP BEING SCARED TO DATE THE PERSON YOU LIKE. 


YES IT IS SCARY. 

YES YOU MIGHT GET HURT. 

BUT YOU MIGHT FALL IN LOVE

YOU MIGHT HAVE SOME OF THE BEST LAUGHS YOU'VE EVER HAD. 

YOU MIGHT HAVE THE BEST CONNECTION WITH THAT PERSON. 

YOU MIGHT HAVE FOUND THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. 

Just don't be dumb and lose them because you're scared. 

If they text you good morning, you're the first thing they thought of.

If they text you asking how you're doing, they care.

If they offer their help. THEY REALLY CARE.

Not everyone does... so appreciate those that do.

GEEZE. 

Dating doesn't have to be this hard.

There's no need for talking then ghosting.

Can we all agree to just stop with the madness... it's getting too confusing! 

My Self Published Book- Coming Soon!

Hey everyone!!

I have been feeling like writing again and decided to get back into this thing.

SOOOO much has happened in the last year that I went on a year long hiatus and needed to regroup before coming back to this and let me tell you, I am back.

BETTA THAN EVA.

A year off from this thing was good.

Gave me time to get some things out of my system and regroup a little bit.

I needed to go out and find myself.

I was going through some stuff personally and I kind of lost who I was a long the way.

Through the last 12 months I have traveled around Texas, did some things I've never done before, met some new people, fell in love and fell out of love. 

It's been a whirlwind but it's been great. 

A few months ago I started really thinking about going back to school to get my Master's degree. 

I talked to a few people about it and one friend said "what is it that you really want to do in life?"

As much as I love what I'm doing it's not my goal in life. 

My goal is to be a writer. 

It always has been. 

When I started writing my book three years ago I loved every bit of it. It made me happy. It got me all excited. 

So, after some serious thinking about it all and getting the guts to get back writing my book... it's back in the works. 

I've always had a vision of what I wanted to write about and although I'm going to change from those 3 little chapters I wrote, I'm going all in. 

This one is going to be for momma. She was my number 1 fan and she would tell me she couldn't wait until it was finished.

This book was and always has been a romance novel.

It will in some way be tied to my life. Whether it be myself or people I've met along the way. 

So don't be surprised if one day real soon I head out to where there's no service, turn my phone off and knock this thing out. 

Here's to the past and looking at the future!!!!

Stay tuned, because it's going to be great!